'Spouses hailing from same city more likely to enjoy conjugal bliss': Survey finds

[Naveed Yaseen]

* Family courts’ data says 58% cases filed by Lahore’s women come from
other cities
* Advocate Surraiya says long distance between woman’s in-laws and parents’ houses major reason for disputes
* Psychologist says difference in education background between spouses, wife and in-laws can also affect relations

By Rana Tanveer
LAHORE: Life partners who belong to the same city are more likely to lead a life full of conjugal bliss than those from different cities or places, according to the data of family cases awaiting adjudication in the city family courts.

Majority of cases were filed by the women from Lahore who were married in other cities. Around 58 percent cases were filed by the city women married with men from other cities, 41 percent cases were pertaining disputes between spouses from within the city, while one percent of the cases were against husbands living abroad.

The subject matters of these cases were suits for dissolution of marriage, for maintenance, for restitution of conjugal rights, and for recovery of dowry items.

The highest number of cases, five percent, were against husbands from Faisalabad. In 1.5 percent of the cases, men from Bahawalnagar and Hafizabad were accused of family disputes, while cases against husbands from Sargodha and Jhang were two percent each, Kasur 3.5 percent, Sheikhupura 4.1 percent, Okara 2.6 percent, Karachi 2.3 percent, Sialkot 2.6 percent and Nankana Sahib 2.6 percent.

Husbands residing in the United Arab Emirates and United States of America were also accused of family disputes with 0.5 percent cases against each. Around 80 percent of the women who petitioned the family courts against their husbands were having at least bachelor degrees.

Long distance: Advocate Surraiya Farzand told Daily Times on Sunday that majority of the city women who had moved to courts were married with men living far from their parents’ home. Due to the long distance between the residences of the women’s in-laws and parents, their husbands could not take them to their parents so often, which was a major reason for disputes between spouses, she added. She said she was appearing in three such cases. “Girls prefer to be married in nearest places to their parents’ homes, since they have to adjust in a different environment after their marriages, and frequent visit to their parents can help them do so,” he added.

Surraiya said, “The city women, mostly, consider marrying with men from other small cities a disadvantage.”

Clinical Psychologist Sajjad Ahmad said, “Women from Lahore lack of all kind of facilities in other cities and they don not want to marry with men from smaller towns. Parents, to dispose of their social liability at the earliest, present false picture to their daughters of their likely in-laws, which later result in marital disputes and end up with wives seeking divorce through courts,” he added.

Educational differences: He said the educational difference between the spouses also matters, since people in the city prefer giving more education to their children than in towns and villages. “The husband’s parents must also be qualified if the wife is educated, otherwise understanding between the wife and her in-laws becomes difficult and leads to disputes.”

Difficult to adjust: Family court official Abdul Majid said the ratio of dissolution of marriages in Lahore was much higher than in other cities. He said he had been working in Multan family courts where not many cases for the dissolution of marriage were filed. He said women from Lahore found it difficult to adjust in small cities.

http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/default.asp...008_pg13_6